Update on Life

Three months since we posted last... We've been out of touch with the world lately, in more ways than one. Here is an update:

- Peace Corps has been pushed back, this time by us. We told them we would have to move our availability date to May of 2010, and they told us our application would expire and we would have to reapply. They promptly withdrew our application without consulting us. We have not reapplied yet, but we intend to. Next time should be smoother.

- We decided to stay in Mobile for one year because life is tough living month to month. I (Amanda) especially felt very unsettled, disconnected with the world, and mildly depressed at times. Many things happened at once that led us to the decision to stay here for a year, and I'm glad we decided that.

- One thing that happened was the beginning of my journey as a yoga instructor. The instructor I have practiced with for a few years encouraged me to get certified and teach at the YMCA, and I now teach one class per week and am looking for more opportunities. I plan to devote this year of my life to developing this skill as much as possible; I think it will be very valuable in the future.

- The other thing that happened was we got kicked out of 51 Eliza Jordan Rd N. When Ben told me Robert and Sarah were renting it, I may have done a little dance. I enjoy my garden, but country life is not for me. Many thanks to the Brenners for allowing us to stay there, but I am happy to move on. And move on we did, to an apartment that puts all other to shame. We now occupy the entire second floor of a 100+ year old house between midtown and downtown. We are walking or biking distance from the best pub in town, a barbeque joint, many drugstores, a wine shop, the farmers' market, pizza joints, sushi, a (crappy) grocery store, gelato, coffee... I could go on. And our apartment- it's huge! It has high ceilings, huge windows, hardwood floors, a balcony, a newly renovated kitchen (thanks to Robert and Ben), and a great neighbor downstairs. The other neighbor is the subject of another blog...

- I am working this week at Flowerama for Mothers' Day, and I may have a part time job there.

Our Mice

This is a little video that we put together because our mice are so cute. When YouTube rejected our first version because it had a popular song at it's background, I recorded this song which I wrote inspired by them a few weeks ago. I hope you enjoy.

If you've got high-speed internet make sure you click "watch in high quality" on the bottom left of the video once you click through to YouTube.

Raw Oysters

Mom and dad took us out to a local sea-food restaurant Nan-Seas for dinner Saturday night. Mom ordered raw oysters on a half shell because she loves them, and I wanted to try them.

I've heard people talk about eating raw oysters since I was small, but never have tried them until Saturday. Some people say you should just swallow them whole as to not be grossed out by the texture or eat them on a cracker, but I didn't mind the texture at all, and happily chewed half of the dozen. Oysters have a rather subtle taste, which I enjoy.

A death in the family

My grandmother died in early December. It's a strange feeling to realize that the entire time you've known a person has been the worst years of her life.

Most of my memories of Granny Hardy, my dad's mother, are a blur. She struggled mentally and emotionally perhaps her entire life. My mother often made excuses for her harsh behavior as a grandmother by reminding my brothers and me that she had a difficult childhood, that her parents were abusive. As a young child of around five years old, I remember going grocery shopping with her on the army base. (My grandfather is an army vet.) I remember her buying me a twelve pack of fun-size candy bars and that we had to go to the same cashier every time because Granny was friends with her. I remember listening to Conway Twitty in the car on the way home. I remember that she always called me "Mandy", and I still hate being called "Mandy." One strong memory, or maybe a feeling, that comes up when I think of her is that she often disregarded my feelings, and I know that is not exclusive to myself. I also remember getting only practical things at Christmas. I have a very vivid image of my cousins and I in a circle in her living room emptying underwear and navel oranges from our Christmas stockings.

In my teenage years I have more distinct examples of when things started to get rough. I remember Granny and Paw Paw yelling at each other a lot. I remember remarks made by my parents about how cruel and critical she was becoming. We would go see my grandparents every Sunday after church, and she always commented on how fat I was getting or asked why I didn't wear much make up.

As I entered high school, Granny went downhill quickly. There were many frantic trips to the ER followed by admittance to the psychiatric ward. When Paw Paw woke up to her holding a knife over him in bed, he started staying at their lake house in Georgia. When she started hallucinating, he put her in a nursing home. They diagnosed her with dementia. Her brain was deteriorating. I was in college by then. Names suddenly escaped her. Soon she had no recollection of her grandchildren or great grandchildren, and we were just nice people who came to visit her sometimes. About a year ago, she had forgotten everyone except for Paw Paw. Soon after that, she quit talking, but she would still act like she recognized him. My last memory of her is of a silent, withered old woman. This image is very detached from the jolly, yet sharp-tongued grandmother I knew as a child. At thanksgiving, Paw Paw told us that she had quit letting the nurses feed her. Her brain was forgetting the last few things it knew: how to swallow, how to breathe, how to live. He did not opt to prolong her life, and she died a week later.

The time surrounding the funeral was very surreal. Many of Granny and Paw Paw's siblings and their families came. It seemed very difficult for people to recall happy memories of her. They were all very vague. She loved to get her hair done. Her house was always clean. She loved her grandchildren. It was embarrassing to struggle for a story to give the woman who was doing the service. I did hear one story that I had never heard before, which was how my grandparents met. Something that has stuck in my mind for a long time is how much Paw Paw loved Granny. He still thought of her as the same woman he married fifty-something years ago. At the visitation and funeral, it almost seemed as if he had lost a woman who had loved him the day before, even though she had been incoherent for so long. From what my mother says, he is still in a lot of pain and not nearly as relieved as he thought he would be once everything was finally over.

The service itself was awkward. My grandparents have never been very religious, but a funeral is often a time when people feel the need to be religious. Paw Paw had asked a friend of Granny's, a female pastor, to officiate. I'm not sure how well they actually knew each other. A few vague ideas about Granny were presented, but the service was much more of an altar call than anything.

My cousin gathered some pictures from Granny's old albums, and the funeral home arranged them into a video to show at the visitation. The woman in that video is so different than the one who was buried. As a young woman, she seemed like a lot of fun. She lead an obviously simple life, but the face in those pictures is not the same woman who criticized me as a child. My grandmother was a kind-hearted woman in her younger days, and she was quite stunning. I wish I had known the woman who was so beautiful, holding her small sons in her arms. I get an empty feeling in the pit of my stomach when I realize I hadn't really ever known Martha Faye Pyles Hardy.

Power Pole Problem

On our way home from FOI Bible Study last night we saw this power pole which had evidently been recently ran into by a vehicle.

Food Blog

We started a food blog because we like food. I'm afraid it may be horribly boring, but I enjoy sharing about my food experiences. Check it out.

http://food.benandamanda.com

Peace Corps Update

The following should explain where we currently are in the Peace Corps process. Hopefully, by posting emails verbatim I will answer many questions you would otherwise have. The following emails are all from today.

Hi, Patrick.

This is Amanda Brenner. I emailed Lenny Bankester recently with all of the information needed to reactivate our file. While you were out of the office, we tried to submit some stuff to the medical office, and they referred us to Lenny, who said we needed to reactivate our file. The medical office has already responded to the medical info we submitted, and I now have more paperwork to get filled out for them. I don't know if that means our file has already been reactivated. So, that is what is going on with me and my husband, Ben.

Thanks,

Amanda

Hi Amanda,

Thank you for your message, and for your continued interest in the Peace Corps.

I have reactivated your applications, as I promised your husband I would do when we spoke a few months ago. I've informed OMS of this as well and they should begin reviewing your medical documents in the near future. I am also transferring you into the 2009 version of your original programs in the Asia region (departing in July) but your medical clearance will ultimately determine if/when/where you can serve.


Sincerely,
Patrick

Hi Amanda,

Sorry - I just realized that you'd been originally considered for English and Health for Central Asia in September of 2008. Would you prefer to remain in consideration of those assignments in September of 2009 or the same combination of jobs but departing for Asia in July of 2009? Either case is fine with me but I mistakenly mentioned the July program below and I don't want to create any confusion.

Best regards,
Patrick

We would really prefer to leave as soon as possible, but if it is a choice between July and September, and we don't know which country either of those programs go to, we would rather leave in July.

Thanks,
Amanda

Hi Amanda,

We don't discuss country names because until you are medically cleared, we don't know if/when/where you can go. As a result of your message below, I have transferred you into a pair of English (Ben) and Health (Amanda) assignments departing for Asia in July. I am the Placement Officer responsible for that program so please feel free to contact me with any changes or updates to your status.

If/when you become medically cleared, I will reassess your applications to determine if this program is even a possibility, or if alternate programs must be located for you.

Sincerely,
Patrick
(End emails)

I go to the doctor tomorrow to get more paperwork filled out about my hypothyroidism. I think that is all that is in our way of being medically cleared. Please pray or send good thoughts our way about resolving this thyroid issue.